This Distance

 

The ghost of me

Doesn’t seem to go

My life that’s been

Seems so long ago

 

But my heart

Still thunders

And it starts so soft

But then gets harder

 

And the pounding

Gets louder

The noise is outstanding

With no surrender

 

The pain screams

Down my veins

And the scene

In my head screams shame

Shame

Shame

 

It starts off quiets

But then slams back down

Again

Again

And

Again

 

The storm

Starts swirling

And my breathing

Starts hurting

 

And the terror

Ascends

I scream get better

But the fear doesn’t end

 

Take one tablet

Then take another

But nothing seems to happen

It’s just one constant disaster

 

Make it stop

Make it run

Relieve the lot

I’m exhausted and done

 

It’s like screaming through

Rain

Where no one can hear you

 

It’s like crying in

Vain

From a voiceless view

 

You throw a stone

Into the pond

But ignore the fact

That the ripples travel on

 

It affects me

It affect you

So why can’t you just see?

That you’re hurting me too

 

You chose to fade away

You chose to cast me out

You chose to use me for play

You chose to lash out

 

So now accept the distance

That is now displayed

So now accept my resistance

To play in your games

 

Your twisted truth

Is not allowed in my life

You have no proof

That I’m telling lies

 

Your hands tainted

With dark tar

Is invasive

Even from afar

 

Colour me in grey

That’s okay

Let those believe

The manipulative words you say

But not on your terms

Not on anyone’s

Will I let you return

With your psychotic shot gun

 

I can’t return to

Your blinded abuse

Which pushes me away

Leaving you confused

 

You’ve taken so much

Just have it all

As under your painful clutch

Is where I will fall

 

You can have it all your way

Let them believe everything you say

 

But I’ve told you once before

Stay away from me

Because you chose to close that door

 

And I have no intention

In trying anymore

I’ve learnt my lesson

Have you learnt yours?

 

That ruining others

Doesn’t fill holes or soothe sores

Did you fucking stutter?

When you said “you’re not welcome here

Anymore”

 

No you didn’t

So keep to that statement

And say good reddens

To my displacement

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